Frank woke up to the smell of piss. When you shared a room with twenty-five other men, there were bound to be odors. One man, only a few bunks away, continued to inform everyone that all medication had snake venom. Frank tried to hold back his frustration. He was staying with some very troubled people but, until he was able to earn a steady income, this shelter was going to be his home. Frank tried to remind himself that there were many others who were sleeping on the street, and he was fortunate to have a roof and bed, but that offered little comfort.
Only a year ago, he had owned a nine-room house and a condo by the beach. However, with a messy divorce and a few bad business decisions, everything was completely wiped out. Now, if he could afford to rent just one room, it would be a miracle. Frank could not believe how quickly his life had changed.
“So, are you going to the party?” asked Lenny, Frank’s bunkmate.
“Huh?”
“Are you attending your nephew’s party?”
“No,” Frank replied.
“Why not? Your family will be there.”
“This isn’t any of your business,” Frank responded as they walked downstairs to breakfast.
“You’re lucky your family still talks to you. My family wouldn’t care if I died tomorrow.” Frank took a deep breath. He had mentioned the party briefly in conversation yesterday, but he never expected Lenny to take such an interest. “It’s your nephew’s birthday,” Lenny continued. “I think he’s long overdo to see his Uncle Frank.”
“You mean his Homeless Uncle Frank.”
“Not for long. You’re a smart man, Frank, and you’re going to be out of here soon. Trust me.”
“Lenny, can you please mind your own business?” Frank struggled not to raise his voice. The last thing he needed was a convicted felon telling him what to do. His family did not know he was homeless, and Frank was going to keep it that way. But if he went to his nephew Aiden’s party, hiding the truth would be very difficult. What would he say when everyone asked how he was doing? What lies would Frank have to tell and how convincing would they be? He thought about his two adorable nieces and how much they enjoyed spending time at his house. What if they found out he was homeless? No, Uncle Frank was not going to attend Aiden’s party.
***
Residents were not allowed to hang in the shelter during the day, but Frank had found a second home at the local library. The library was quiet and serene, and he could easily spend hours getting lost in books. But he would much rather be spending his time working. Frank wanted to deposit so much money in his shelter bank account that they would kick him out for being “too rich.” Instead, his caseworker was admonishing him for not making any deposits. She warned that he could be expelled for laziness, but Frank was not lazy. He had applied to all the local employers, emphasizing his management experience, but nobody was interested. Did his recent business failure make him toxic?
Frank reminded himself that he was better off than some of the other shelter residents. Unlike Jeff, he did not have a wife and family in Africa to support. Frank’s ex-wife never wanted children, and now it seemed that was for the best. The only person Frank needed to support was himself, but he was still failing miserably. Some of the residents were recovering alcoholics, and he now understood why people drank. Frank also understood why Mike tried to end his life. After being rushed to the hospital, Mike’s bed was quickly turned over to someone new, and he was soon forgotten at the shelter. Whenever a resident was hospitalized or arrested or went missing, their bed was immediately reassigned. Frank was not sure how his shelter stay would end, but he would not let it end tragically.
Anxiety began to creep in, but he would not let it take over. It was time to browse the library aisles and decide what to read. Was he in the mood for non-fiction or biography? As Frank was surveying the books, he noticed an author with the first name Leonard. His bunkmate Lenny was suddenly on his mind. When Frank returned to the shelter for dinner, Lenny would be pestering him again about Aiden’s birthday party. Once Lenny was interested in something, he did not let it alone. How could he get his bunkmate to shut up once and for all? Frank was not going to attend the party, and that was that. He continued browsing through the library books when a biography on Andrew Carnegie caught his eye. How many homeless people had benefited from all the libraries Carnegie built? For those who slept on the street, libraries might be their only refuge from the outdoor elements.
It was time for dinner, and residents were now allowed back in the shelter. Frank hoped there would be a way to avoid Lenny, but he knew that was impossible.
“Hey Frank, I have something for you,” said Lenny. Frank was shocked to see his bunkmate holding a large wrapped gift. “It’s a present for your nephew.”
“You’re giving my nephew a present?”
“No, you are. You’re going to the party.” Frank shook his head as he started heading over to the nearest mirror. He was due for a shave.
“I know you don’t have the money,” continued Lenny, “but you can pay me back later. You are going to get a job, Frank. I know it.”
“Did you really buy that gift?” asked Frank.
“I have a receipt. And here, here’s a photo of the gift.” Lenny held up his smartphone to show a photo of building blocks. “I know kids, Frank, and your nephew is going to love these.”
“Lenny, how many times must I say this? My family is not your business.”
“Okay, Frank, I’ll admit it. I’m not an expert on your family. But there is one thing I do know. They have not shut you out. So, don’t shut them out. You hear me, Frank. Don’t shut your family out.” Frank could see that other residents were listening to the conversation with interest. There was no such thing as privacy in this hellhole.
***
It was early Saturday evening, and Frank was taking a train back to the shelter. He could not recall the last time he had felt so energized. His nephew and nieces were delighted to see him. Whether he was rich or homeless, he was still the same Uncle Frank. His nieces were dazzled to hear about the books he was reading at the library. They were amazed to learn that Hawaii was a kingdom before it became a state, and how the now obsolete telegraph transformed communication. Aiden loved his birthday gift so much that neighbors wanted to buy the same blocks for their child. Frank was not ashamed to admit that Lenny was right. He should not shut out his family.
But Frank did not tell them about his current residential conditions. There were some things that should remain a secret. Yet, perhaps his family or friends might be able to help him find employment. His brother was very good at utilizing connections, and his sister might also have a lead or two. How much should Frank open up about his challenges? He could tell them he was unemployed, but how many details should he share? His sister could be nosy at times, and he should be prepared for questions. His brother also seemed a bit suspicious when he gave his nieces so many details on American history. Since when had Frank suddenly become such an avid reader? There was so much he needed to consider when talking to his family, but this would be an issue for another day. Right now, Frank was thinking about getting back to the shelter and seeing Lenny. He could not wait to show his bunkmate that video of Aiden building with the blocks.
As Frank was walking into the shelter lobby, Jeff pulled him aside.
“Did you hear about Lenny?” Jeff asked.
“No, what about him?”
“He jumped out the window and ran away.”
“Huh?”
“He saw a police car outside and it spooked him,” Jeff continued. “I’m not sure why the police were here. They might have been looking for him, but I don’t know.” Frank was shocked. He knew that Lenny had spent time in prison but did not realize that he was still a wanted man.
All throughout the evening, Frank remained preoccupied with his former bunkmate. Was Lenny now in jail or was he hiding away somewhere? What crime was he wanted for? Frank owed Lenny so much, but he would not be seeing him again anytime soon. And even if he did see Lenny, he would have little to offer right now. Until Frank was able to help himself, there was little he could do for anyone else. In the meantime, Lenny’s bed was going to be reassigned to a new resident tomorrow. No bed at the shelter stayed empty for long. Frank began to wonder whom his new bunkmate might be. It could be someone who was just evicted from his home or maybe released from prison. But it could also be someone who was currently sleeping on the street.
All of a sudden, Frank was stung with guilt. As long as he continued to occupy a shelter bed, he was denying it to another person. Some stranger could be living on the street now because of him. If he went to stay with his brother or sister, the shelter would have one more bed available. He tried to push the thought away, but the guilt continued to haunt him. He was occupying a bed that other people needed far more than he did. Was it time to open up and tell his family the full truth? The idea made Frank tremble, but he needed to do what was right. Tomorrow morning he would figure out what to say to his brother and sister. None of those conversations were going to be easy, but they were necessary. Still enduring the smell of piss, Frank dozed off in his bunk and dreamed that he was back in his former house.