Darkness

I can’t take back, can’t undo,
Sometimes I have to watch it grow within me,
the darkness
adding to the quiet inside
watching all activities from the secret silk route beneath my skin.

Sometimes the process is invisible, it is the absence
of something,
too much blackness to sleep in, feeling numb, suffocated
breaths too close, too knowable
I know the sense of sinking in the shifting sands

The smile, joy and laughter are not quite reaching the lips,
and as in dark stories,
something I have to turn a blind eye and that
belong to memories and cureless time
enmesh in one another

I seek the light in darkness now and always.